Thursday, April 2, 2015

Bravery without Bravado


Whenever I think of my father, first thing I remember is he dropping me to school on Saturday morning! Our primary school on Saturday used to be early morning and so my father could drop me to school. I always used to admire him carrying my schoolbag which he used to easily hold like a carry-bag and that would still not touch ground! I used to find that bag so heavy on my back!! His strength used to assure me that “all is well” and till date when I look back he did many things with ease that I can only admire.

Just like many of you who have their fathers as heroes, I also have many stories about him, but the one of those stories taught me a few lessons in life –as usual in his inimitable style of action speaking than words.

He worked with a large cooperative bank as a head of Legal and Personnel after his retirement from Government job. It was in eighties and though the corruption was not rampant it was there for sure. One of the local politicians who was somehow associated with the bank had started a racket of taking some money from people and assure them jobs at the bank. My father had sensed this and outsourced the entrance examination to one of the reputed banking institutes. He was aware that people who generally adopt this kind of ‘money’ route never clear entrance exams on merit and he was bang on target!

Once after one such recruitment drive, he got a call from this politician. After the initial pleasantries, my father was told to ‘accommodate ‘a few ‘needy’ people whom the politician knew. My father politely said that he does not have any control over the exam results as it is outsourced. After a bit of cajoling, the politician got extremely annoyed. He realised what my father had done and he yelled, “Do you know to whom you are talking to? I will send a truck-load of my men to kill you!” My father was quiet as ever and replied, “You know the office address anyway and in case you need my residence address here it is” and disconnected the phone quietly after giving the residential address. When my mother heard about this, she was extremely anxious. My father patiently explained, “It is just a threat. He would not do anything. Why should he send a truck-load of men to kill me when only one or two would be enough? He is just trying to scare me. Don’t worry and if he really does something, the labour union would shut down the bank. They know that I have always maintained absolute fairness in everything that we do with the staff!” Nothing more was said….

When I look back, I admire his guts. Here was a common man who had no backing of anyone and had family to take care. He was completely unfazed and he never deviated from his path. Man of few words, he had no bravado. Knowing fully well what was coming, he had outsourced the exam and ensured that he did what was right with minimum fuss. Keeping the exam in-house and then doing what he did was waging an open war which was un-necessary. He was clearly focused on what he wanted and exactly achieved it.

Bravery is not about bravado. It is all about anticipating avoidable risks, mitigating them without any bravado or noise and just ensure that you do what is right. There was no fear but there was no chest-thumping either. For him it was his routine duty and no-one could come in the way of his duty! He remains my lighthouse whenever there is any storm in my life!

Wednesday, March 25, 2015

The stereotype of ‘self-made man’


My father’s story is perhaps representative of his generation in India – story of a small-town boy moving out at an early age to figure out life in bigger city, humongous efforts to set up a family in the big city while still remaining in touch with the roots ……

My father grew up in a place called Kolhapur – a city that has been traditionally known for its art, culture and love for food but not much for its industry. He started his career in Indian Postal Department at an early age … gave his examination to get selected for a central government job through an all-India exam …

In the year 1952, at the age of 20, he set out to New Delhi for his job. Well, going from Kolhapur to New Delhi was a big deal … actually had a little article published about his departure to Delhi in local newspaper!! Going so far away, though within the country, was quite challenging … the only way for his family to know that he reached was through a letter .. the snail-mail – phones were rare and telegrams were premium – generally reserved for breaking bad news urgently ….No one told him that it is quite cold up-north so finally he had to cover himself with the bedding in the train to fight the biting cold!

Many twists and turns in life which were perhaps a common theme for his generation … a generation that migrated to big city … bought their own house …. Started family … invested in kids’ education –all starting from scratch!

In true sense Vasudeo is a ‘self-made’ man. There is lot of pride in self-made men, many times crossing a thin line into the area of vanity! Many a times the self-made people take themselves too seriously – prefer to live in the nostalgia and there is always certainty of what is right and what is not. My father has no such pretence – even now he continuous to live life with a lot of curiosity – embracing new things with ease. For example, he had never used T-shirts and Jeans till the age of about 65 – may be because of his job as government officer and then a banker of his time. But when he decided to visit my siblings in the US for the first time – he just changed his wardrobe to jeans and T-shirts and changed his diet habits to whatever vegetarian food that was available in US. Traveling abroad to places like US may cause some discomfort for senior citizens who have lived life in a particular way – not my father. He along with my mother just freaked out for a few months he spent there! Now, far the past two decades he still enjoys his jeans and T-shirts. Was he a rebel? Not at all … he followed a perfect dress code during his employment and then easily came out of it to put it behind and enjoy a new life – no pretence of either “our times or good old days” … or “breaking the shackles” … just living life as it unfolds…. taking into stride the changes that life brings….. easily accepting that there are many ways to lead one’s life ….. unflappable when your son decides to test your patience (more about that later)…

In  spite of being a ‘self-made man’ he does not follow that stereotype or any stereotype for that matter …. Always happy with what life presents….  inquisitive about change …. Living with him is a joy-ride …. I will take you through some of it as I go along and hopefully you will enjoy the ride J

Wednesday, March 18, 2015

The identity



I stand at a juncture where I am going through one of the major transitions in my career – getting into entrepreneurship from a corporate career that has given me so much….. well, not that I am doing it for the first time in my life but it is still a significant change. At this juncture it is natural to think what changes and more importantly what does not ….what defines me?

I was fortunate to get diverse exposure without changing too many jobs. Over the years, roles, responsibility, titles and a few times the logo on visiting card changed. None of it was my identity neither would ‘an entrepreneur’ be my identity. Identity is something that is permanent, identity is something that is not printed on your visiting card but it is something etched on your heart – something that you do not want to change

..So what is really my identity? Well answer to that question is fairly straightforward … My identity is and will always be “Vasudeo’s child”. Vasudeo is my father’s name and I along with my siblings continue to take liberty to call him by his name.

Calling oneself ‘child’ at the age of 45 may sound little weird but when I think of my father, I feel like a child … a child still in awe of his father without ever being scared of him ….a child who thinks that his father will always have an answer without ever feeling burden of father’s wisdom ….a child who feels the joy of being a child without ever feeling ‘small’!

This blog will be series of stories about my father who continues to inspire me and my family, has always been the silent force while we navigate our lives.

But it is not his life story really – every story is an impression he left on my mind as a child – his child. These are the stories that shaped my life over the years as I grew up – these are the stories that gave me my identity as “Vasudeo’s child”.

Well! I am not somebody whose stories you should read or even bother about but perhaps these are your stories as well – may be these stories will resonate with you as there is always someone like Vasudeo in everyone’s life.

Join me as I narrate stories of my continued childhood as “Vasudeo’s child”!